Travel makes it better: 7 awkward holiday conversations

Travel makes it better: 7 awkward holiday conversations

We’ve all been there. It’s the last six weeks of the year, and you have family/work/boyfriend/girlfriend events to go to, with more awkward conversations to count.

But not this year. 

This year is your year. 

This year, you’re going to talk about your travel experiences and guide the conversations however you want.

Haven’t traveled? Errr…good luck. Your conversations are more likely to go the way of awkward. Take a look at what happens when you add travel to the mix…

During Thanksgiving when you're sitting next to Aunt Franny

Haven’t traveled

Aunt Franny: Have I told you about my colonoscopy?

You: Please don’t.

Aunt Franny: It wasn’t as bad as you think. Just an annual check up.

You: Please stop.

Aunt Franny: The night before though, I was on the toilet for hours.

You: I’m going to throw up.                 

Traveled

Aunt Franny: Have I told you about my colonoscopy?

You: No, but have I told you about my trip to London? It was amazing!

Aunt Franny: Oh, that’s so lovely.

You: It really was. Will you pass the pie?

 Photo by Jasmine T. in London, England

Photo by Jasmine T. in London, England

When you run into your ex at a bar the night before Thanksgiving

Haven’t traveled

Ex: Hey, so good to see you! Have you met my new girlfriend? We’re totally in love.

You: Oh, that’s nice.

Ex: Are you seeing anyone?

You: No, not right now.

Ex: That’s a shame. Did I mention how in love we are? We met in law school. Both top of the class. Isn’t life magical? But hey, don’t worry. You’ll find someone…someday…probably?

You: *smiles and nods, proceeds to buy the strongest drink in the bar*

Traveled

Ex: Hey, so good to see you! Have you met my hot new girlfriend? We’re totally in love.

You: Oh, that’s nice.

Ex: Are you seeing anyone?

You: No, I’ve been too busy traveling to have a relationship. I just got back from Spain, it was incredible. Plus, the guys there are way hotter than in America. But you two still make a cute couple!

Ex:

You: I’m going to see if they have sangria. Adios!

 Photo by Eunice Beck, while making Paella in Barcelona, Spain

Photo by Eunice Beck, while making Paella in Barcelona, Spain

Talking to the turkey you're about to cook

Haven’t traveled

You: You’re going to be delicious, turkey.

Dead turkey: *says nothing because it’s a turkey*

You: Now how do I season you...

Dead turkey: *says nothing because it’s a turkey*

You: Ketchup it is!

Traveled

You: You’re going to be delicious, turkey.

Dead turkey: *says nothing because it’s a turkey*

You: Now how should I season you...

Dead turkey: *says nothing because it’s a turkey*

You: Should I could go with Italian spices for my time in Italy? Asian for my time in Asia? So many delicious, flavorful, tasty options!!

 Photo by Krystal L. in the Damnoen Saduak Floating Market in Thailand

Photo by Krystal L. in the Damnoen Saduak Floating Market in Thailand

When you’re at your girlfriend’s office party

Haven’t traveled

HR Steve: So what do you do here?

You: I don’t work here. My girlfriend does.

HR Steve: Cool, cool. *breathes garlic directly into your nose*

You: I think I’m gonna go find something to eat.

HR Steve: Try the garlic shrimp. Or the crackers. They’re covered in—

You: Garlic?

HR Steve: Yeah!

You: Goodbye.

Traveled

HR Steve: So what do you do here?

You: I don’t work here. My girlfriend does.

HR Steve: Cool, cool. *breathes garlic directly into your nose*

You: What are you eating? That smells great.

HR Steve: Garlic shrimp.

You: Ugh, I love garlic. Did you try the garlic noodles over there? Special recipe I learned in Vietnam.

HR Steve: You made those?!

You: I sure did. *breathe garlic directly into his nose*

 Photo by Carley M. in Ha Long Bay, Vietnam

Photo by Carley M. in Ha Long Bay, Vietnam

When you get stuck talking to the wine store cashier

Haven’t Traveled

Store clerk: *Eyeing your 7 bottles of wine* Wow, someone’s thirsty.

You: Haha. Umm…it’s for a party?

Store clerk: Cool. Can I come?!

You: Oh, well…

Store clerk: Also, are you allergic to birds? I’m pet sitting for my mom so I’ll have to bring her parakeets with me.

Traveled

Store clerk: *Eyeing your 7 bottles of wine* Wow, someone’s thirsty.

You: I just got back from a trip to Florence! In Italy, wine is a very important part of the daily culture and the country’s traditions, and I just want to relive my time there. It was magical.

Store clerk: You learn something new every day! Here’s 50% off your purchase for sharing that tidbit of travel knowledge!

 Photo by Morgan M., Product Marketing Manager at EF Ultimate Break

Photo by Morgan M., Product Marketing Manager at EF Ultimate Break

Dancing with a stranger at the club on New Year's Eve

Haven’t traveled

Random Stranger (RS): *music blaring* I love this song.

You: *music blaring* What?

RS: *music blaring* I love this song

You: *music blaring* Oliver swan?

RS: *music blaring* What’s your name?

You: *music blaring* Sorry, I don’t know the name of this song.

Traveled

Random Stranger (RS): *music blaring* I love this song.

You: *music blaring* Did you know this song was the #1 hit in Spain when I was there?

RS: *music blaring* I love this song

You: *music blaring* Did I eat olives while listening to this song? That’s a weird question, but yes, yes I did.

 Photo by Eunice Beck in Barcelona, Spain

Photo by Eunice Beck in Barcelona, Spain

When you’re sitting in the sauna with three naked old people

Haven’t traveled

Old Man 1: Home for the holidays?

You: Actually I live around here.

Old Man 2: Well if you’re interested, we get together in this sauna 3 times a week to let loose.

You: Thank you for offering, but…

Old Man 3: What, you’re busy text messaging and posting on that Tweeter?

You: I’m so sorry…I’ll just go…

Traveled

Old Man 1: Home for the holidays?

You: Actually I live around here.

Old Man 2: Well if you’re interested, we get together in this sauna 3 times a week to let loose.

You: Thanks for offering, but this time next week, I’ll be soaking in the Blue Lagoon in Iceland!

Old Man 3: Sounds better than this old sauna. Here’s some spending money for while you’re there, steam buddy!

 Photo by Briana L. at the Blue Lagoon in Iceland

Photo by Briana L. at the Blue Lagoon in Iceland

cb5b.jpg

Start Exploring

Travel Outfit of the Day. Yeah, it’s a thing.

Travel Outfit of the Day. Yeah, it’s a thing.

How to break down the language barrier

How to break down the language barrier